Just (B)eat It!

Hello, chickpeas!

I just got home from São Paulo (yes, I went there once again… I love that city). It wasn´t much, but I loved the idea of getting out of town for a while. And since everyone else is doing the same, I thought – why not?

Anyhow. Onto more serious subjects…

I won´t be a hypocrite. I did read all the comments you guys left me on my last post. My first reaction was anger. I was SO angry at myself. How could I let this happend… once again? Who was I trying to fool – but myself?

I probably wouldn´t have noticed anything wrong if it wasn´t for you guys. ED was taking over, and I didn´t even see that. This is what scares me the most. I feel like I have no willpower against ED. When it decides to take over… I´m just a toy in its hands.

I know what you´re thinking. “JUST EAT IT! IT´S NOT THAT HARD! JUST PUT THE DAMN FOOD IN YOUR MOUTH!”.

And what´s worst – I know you´re right. It´s as simple as that. Eating. Chewing. Swallowing.

I´m sorry for taking your time. But I need to let it out. I FEEL STUPID. THE STUPIDEST PERSON IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

(Oh, gosh. That feels good.)

But, anyway. I just wanted to thank you all (once again) for opening my eyes. Waking me up. And, let me tell you, that wake-up call was really necessary.

Thank You, readers. Thank You, bloggers. Thank You, anonymous.

🙂

The trip to São Paulo was pretty good. I did have my fair share of fun. The event my Mom was working on (Bradesco´s Walk and Run for Longevity) went great, even a few small celebrities showed up. Me and Bruna shared some good laughs.

I´ll just post some highlights of the last few days… Before, during and after my trip.

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Whole Wheat Quiche, Pasta, Chicken Sausage, Steamed Veggies (beets, carrots and chayote)

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Mango

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Cantaloupe

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Juicy Pear

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6” turkey breast sub with olives, pickles, cucumber, lettuce and mustard on the whole wheat bread with an Iced Tea on the side 

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“Pastel de Forno Integral” – whole wheat dough with Ricotta and Dried Tomato filling

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Falafel Sandwich – hummus and veggies on the side – with Iced Tea

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Hotel Breakfast – toast, turkey blanquet, fruit salad, papaya and milk+chocolate powder

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Passion Fruit Popsicle

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Buffet-Craziness: roasted veggies, chicken ravioli, gnocchi with tomato sauce, heart-of-palms slices, ginger, tabouli and grilled tilapia (the garlic bread was my sister´s)

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Plus a slice of cheese quiche.

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Banana+Raw Oats

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Plain Yogurt+granola plus a fruit salad

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Salmon Quiche with a Mushroom Salad

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Mozzarella-Eggplant with Tomato Sauce

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Zucchini Calzone with Pesto Sauce (Iced Tea on the side)

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Ginormous Turkey Breast and White Cheese sandwich with whole wheat bread

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Smoked Salmon with White Cheese and Pesto Sauce on Ciabatta Bread (that´s 1/3 of it)

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Turkey Breast and White Cheese Calzone

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HUGE salad: lettuce, turkey breast, broccoli, cauliflower, heart-of-palms, cherry tomato, gorgonzola, buffalo mozzarella and cooked beets, with a lemon-mustard-yogurt dressing and mango slices on the side

WARNING: These were only the highlights! That´s not everything I ate on the last few days – far from it!

I´ll let you guys know how it goes – but I can tell you my mind is my number #1 enemy right now. It´s hard work, for sure.

See you lovelies soon!

XOXO

G.

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4 Comments

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4 responses to “Just (B)eat It!

  1. The one piece of advice that people used to give me when I asked for help, and the one that annoyed me to no end was “Just eat”. Yes, that's exactly what we have to do, but no one understands that it's nowhere near as simple as it sounds. Physically eating is not that hard, but mentally willing ourselves to do so? That's where the whole battle lies. It's a difficult one, hun, that's for sure… probably the hardest one you'll ever have to face, but it's one that you need to conquer to get your life back and be free and happy.

    I know that it feels like ED is in control and you have no power over it, but you DO. You CAN make that choice to take control, but you have to be willing to put up a fight and deal with the anxiety. You can do it, love, and I can promise you that it's very worth it.

  2. Fi

    Hi there!! thanks for posting on my blog, now i can follow yours 🙂
    I know it is physically easy to eat, but its the mental trauma and adtermath thats the hard part. What you need to figure out is WHAT is this MENTAL trauma all about?? WHY cant u eat and WHY do u feel bad after? Figure this out logically and once you do, “just eating” could become a lot easier!
    Good luck, ill be trying to follow my own advice too!
    P/s-do it for you, your life, your health!
    xoxoxoxoox

  3. It seems cliche, but just hang in there. You have a lot of support online to help pick you up when you're having one of those days.

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